Aimless ingenuity of disappointment

It was 03:28am before the dawn,
I was awakened by a sweet dream,
although it was just a short 2-3hours nap,
I am so blissful to have such a nice dream.

Well out of a sudden,
I knew it wasn’t right, everything flows effortlessly and nice things are
getting closer to approach you – to me it was just another peculiar dream.

I forced myself, keep telling myself to break apart this traumatic story,
tho once I woke up I knew I would have to bear with the miserable feeling,
it was instigated by several inadequate pieces of shortcoming postures.

From the beginning I have already estimated these outcomes,
I knew it will not last any longer than the particular time,
.. I can’t expect that it was coming so soon,
maybe I couldn’t accept the fact, though it was averred reluctantly.



This is one of the best songs I’ve ever heard,
it was suggested by one of my best friend.
I love this song so much,
it reveals descending phrases of one’s soul,
love sees no limit to its diligence, no end to its faith, no withering of its hope,
it can live longer than anything,
In the end, I insist on believing love still stands when all else has set off.

Well I have promised myself that I will stay strong and not staying at the same predetermined spot. Good times are always ahead of you, why would you miss it?

Had an awesome dinner with my family

What's more than having fun when you're having an awesome dinner with your family?

I am sick during this holy season! oh my...

well there's nothing more than extraordinary, you will realized family and friends is more important than a monotonous relationship which trapped you in the state of anguishing and self-centreedness, you would probably engrossed yourself with undesirable affairs.

I am going to upload some pics of x’mas preparation for the dinner!

White and red sauce with mayonnaise! 

Preparing coleslaw, veg salad and some fresh tomatoes!

Thousand island, coleslaw sauce...

Looks pretty amazing, self-cook herb wedges!

Mash Potato! with a rich taste of butter and fresh milk with herbs.

add on with a layer of luxuriant black pepper gravy!

Coleslaw! 

Stripping russet potato!

Delicious pan fried + grilled chicken thighs!

marinated with Rosemarry, teriyaki sauce, natural sweet honey and several herbs!

the taste is awesome!

Preparing cheese and black pepper hot dogs + tomato pasta for spaghetti!

Part 2 will be continued!

Coordinate myself to an equivalent prescription

It’s been a few days ago since the last post,
I couldn’t believe how much I miss you since our last conversation,
every time when I am going to bed, I would begin a small prayer and asking for strengths to overcome all the distresses and difficulties.

As day gone by, I have adapted myself to your absent,
each of your words were sculpted in my mind,
It is so hard to believe that you’re actually doing this to me...

These few days I am trying to put you out of my sight,
but it’s so hard for me to do that once you have appeared,
I thought I can be as stone-hearted as you,
but I can’t... Not even prolong for more than a minute.

Obviously I have did what I am supposed to,
the rest is up to you,
whether you like it or not,
Decisions has been indisputable ever since the day you left me.

What I hope to gain from this relationship...

Soothing the path of despondent

I always have faith that we are meant to tread our journey together...
I wont stop you now from leaving because I know in my heart that all roads you are going to take will lead and end up with mine...
I try to convince my self that its only crush but i finally know we both have feelings she is my best friend but we have our own lives...



Love will lead you back
Someday I just know that
Love will lead you back to my arms
Where you belong
I'm sure, sure as stars are shining
One day you will find me again
It won't be long
One of these days
Our love will lead you back

everything's over...

Gradually shattered with...

Well… it’s another new post I am about to create now from the past 14days,
Time has inadvertently flown by,
As we are getting older,

There are more upcoming challenges approaching us and assessing one’s assurance.
What a wretched nocturnal contemplations to me by curing and indulging with someone’s empathy,
for my part I will be remaining the same. Stay put of everything together one at a time because I knew a disaster will turn out soon if I were deferring unobtrusively without having the determination for resolving the entire pending instances.

As days goes by my heart gently strengthens cold towards all affiliation and the fragile bond between us,
As time goes by none of us will be residing adolescent, all of us is going to reach the stages of mind developing and becoming an adult someday,
Lately I have adapted myself to loneliness, an unrevealing soul which hidden inside its heart and expecting for someone’s compassion.

As long as I have been waited, what is up to for me? Been tolerantly waiting for your downhearted calls and messages for every single minute, been looking up to the stupid screen for more than few hours daily just want to have a nice conversation with you.
What is wrong with me…
I thought I can be as tough as necessary,
But I am not…



This is a one of the remarkable song from Mariah's,
although the music is not as nice as the previous one - we belongs together, bye bye or don't forget about us,
but the lyric of this song is truly expressive and laying emphasis on each and everyone's broken heart.

We said let go but I kept on hanging on,
Inside I know it's over, you're really gone,
it's killing me because there ain't nothing I can do
Baby - I will stay in love with you.

I wish her the best...

I know you could not let go of him,
Please… For the sake of me, just put everything aside first…
Next week will be your final exam, I do hope that you have prepared while on the verge of your finals.

You are one of my best friends ever since I knew you during my secondary school,
we have been doing crazy stuff, crying or sharing the joyful moments together.
I really hope that you are going to stay confident and focus on your exam.

Be bold my friend, all the best to you. May god bless you and keep you benediction!
Do well in your exam,
We will meet each other soon Mei See!

Devotions and...

Right now it was 2.30am and I am waiting for someone’s message before I could get myself be asleep in a thoroughly condition. 

The same feelings came across me when I started to login my blogger account and my favorite enthrall music – Emmanuel and We Belongs Together had repeatedly played while I was about to create a new post.

Well obviously it is raining heavily outside, I am having a cup of hot chocolate as soon as I am about to continue my new post.

My mood has considerably change each and every time when the weather is rainy and I am looking outside from the window that portrayed everywhere is misty and wet whereas the sound of raindrops slowly turned me into the state of anesthetized with its fussing mood which makes me feel so sick of doing everything.

Right now, I wish I could have a walk around the garden while it's raining,

possibly I am not able to accept the facts that the distance between us had gone further than what I have thought.
While I was walking, my tears inadvertently mingled with the rains,
I was shouting towards the sky and asked, why would I ever be in love with you?
How many pain and misery do I need to undergo before I could reach myself to you?

It is the same bore rigid questions when I was asking about myself, am I doing this for your sake?
What would you feel if I have putting my friends more important than you?

Same goes to what I felt to this person,
for each and every second, Can’t you feel the love between us is getting stronger and enduring throughout these months?

Your scent has gradually gone in my heart, it was a sweet and warmhearted essences that would cheer me up when I am having trouble to deal with…

Although I was opposed to accept your arrogances and manners,
but I have to stop lying to myself that you have definitely stayed…

| Will Be Continued |

| Is it worth for waiting? |

I will always remember what happened on today's occasion.
Today we were supposed to have our dinner together and later on we have planned to get a wifi wireless connectivity broadband. Everything has been scheduled by me earlier when I am having my lecture class.

Certainly, some unlikable cases happened and we quarrelled because of some small matters. Although I portrayed the state of unruffled condition in front of her, in fact I truly care about how she feels and I always wanted her to be happy during the time when we were both together. When the moment her face turned into a wrath-appearing angel, I knew that it gives me the impression of frightening and disquieting about what I have did earlier that could lead to such a nasty consummation of dating.

Despite of this, I do care so much about her,
The moment when she was depressed, I wish I could give her a tight hug…
The moment when she needs to be accompanied, I would like to volunteer myself to be the first person who listen to her troubles and being caring to her.

Why is this happening to me? I can live happily without bearing with all these worries and being upset at any time without any reasons. I have had enough with this kind of feeling. I did not ask for any returns of everything that I have did for you, perhaps there is a simple thing that you can do it for me – appreciate and treasure the moment when we were both together.

Maintaining and keeping up this relationship is much harder than what I have expected earlier, but I will not give up easily. This song – Emmanuel has precipitated it's beginnings...

Will be continued…

anticipating -| Myself |-

I was waiting for your calls, messages and replies from messenger.
Every time when I feel upset, I will be listening to Mariah’s we belongs together.
The lyric of this song is meaningful and it heartrending me when I was listening to it.

I have never had such a deep soreness in my heart…
I remembered that day when you were so busy and you couldn’t be bothered to reply me…
When I gone back home, looking at the disgruntled monitor screen and waiting for you to start a conversation with me… Because of this, I’ve been upsetting and feeling miserable for whole day without any reason. I just got myself to bed and try to avoid all the misery feelings but it is not working. 
The moment when I woke up, I guess your message would never appeared on the forsaken screen and I unremittingly thinking of you and the undesirable state of mind is approaching me again… How nice if I have not got up and everything’s remained calm as what I’ve dreamed…

I am not demanding you for doing everything for me,
I am not expecting you for any outgoing activities,
but…
I do hope that you have positioned me into your heart as the first person you would ever tell or sharing anything with…

How nice if you could… 

| The journey’s end… |

This could be one of the happiest and nervous moments in my life. Well..
Starting from morning, I did not have a nice sleep though... Approximately 3-4 hours. It’s killing me…
Around 11am me and one of my best friends ‘we’ have started our journey for seeking keyboard…
You know… Nowadays musical keyboard are unlike the older days, there are various kind of models with the latest complexity of functions. I am really amazed that Yamaha’s keyboard sound samples were  astonishingly sophisticated and authenticated, the AWM sound sample layer was amazing… you wouldn’t believe it until you try it yourself at any Yamaha nearest outlet.


Today we have sought out a total of 5 outlets nearby Damansara. From what I’ve observed, it is a good experience for spending time and testing out each of these instruments as you would probably have some ideas before buying any of these expansive instruments.
There are some minor changes in Pelangi ever since I have left the school. They have rearranged the entire instruments that positioned previously on the showroom. I guess it looks more spacious and orderly as for myself I found out that the atmosphere were gratified and the instruments were placed appropriately compared to a year ago.


Well mentioning about the staff… I guess you should know what I am going to say regarding to this matter. However most of the staff that I knew was shifted to other branch and I meet a nice Malay lady who enthusiastically served us when we were asking about prices and equipment of the instrument like sustain pedal... Additionally, she warmly provided us the focal information  without hesitation. Once we went out from the showroom, it was totally out of my expectation. I thought the staff will be … *you know lol* … Well I missed this place ever since the day I left my lesson, someday I would like to visit it again…

| Back To The Past |

Well tomorrow I am going to Pelangi Yamaha music centre. Hope there aren’t many changes since the day I left. I am quite excited actually, because this place has brought me over a stack of unforgettable memories. I remembered a year ago I was performing with two of my best friend in the music hall, we were crazy together, and we have shared so much fun together along the music lessons. 

Flashback a year ago, I still remembered myself travelling to the music centre for each weekend by taking public transport – It was a horrible nightmare, trust me you wouldn’t want to try it once you have tried. It takes more than one and a half hour to reach the destination… It is silly right? If I were driving, most probably it takes 20 minutes only… *well I would keep it as a good experience even though it was an unpleasant journey*.

Talking about friends, we barely talk to each other now as each of us is getting busier on our studies or works. What is more exciting than having band lesson in this music school? Try to make a guess...
*is …. Playing the ELS-01C or EL-900 probably for me only ;P*  We got our ass up and bumped on the bench and playing the organ like there is no tomorrow. *wink*

I have learnt so much from the past and I do not regret of taking any of these courses, joining band classes and participated in any competition or performing on the stage. It was a good experience that made me bold enough for the upcoming challenges.

Well... I should put a full stop here.

||Will Be Continued||

最近的我..

近来，我的脾气变得十分的暴躁，
也很没有耐性的集中在我的工作...
天啊... 是我出了问题吗?

其实，今天我都很满意...也很乐意的听您诉苦,
您的伤心也让我很难过...
可是您可以让我更了解你吗?
让我更深入的踏入您的心理...

无奈的一天就又这样度过了...
希望明日所有的一切会变得更美好.... =(  
也许吧...

再遇回｜等待着一种感觉 ?

这一种感觉已经渐渐的离我而去自从我们的分离.

在今天的凌晨,我慢慢的倒叙回我们之间回忆,有一股很浓郁的思念…

时间不知不觉的从我们身上溜走了，

毕竟已过了一年多, 接近两年…

但我还蛮怀念当时我们在一起的时候,

当时没有烦恼的我，

只为了我的爱好而继续快乐的过着我的生活..

当然,这一切在我脑海里仍然反复着就如播放音乐般..

可是这一切已经成为了过去,

我会好好的珍惜这一段回忆,

感谢您把这一段美好的回忆都留下给彼此,

谢谢您的照顾, 您的关怀..

我们有缘再见吧..

鸿上.

feeling clumsy and...

Exam is coming soon!

be prepared!

finally!! found back the pen which I though I've lost it from 2 months ago, 

I'm so glad that this mechanical pencil has been found,

This would be one of the most important & meaningful gift from one of my good friend,

This pen is important to me & brings back the beautiful memories between us

thank you, as a sign for your support and appreciation =)

*refreshing now* haha

Dear lord,

thanks for everything you gave us,

please bless and help us lord, as we are living in a world of difficulties and challenging,

please give us strength and let us devote to the sacred heart of Jesus,

thank you,

In the name of Jesus. Amen.

random music =)

Oh well,
I wanted to play this song for so long ago, but I couldn't find the proper version of this song.. What I mean to say is... I am finding the version which is closed to the original sound track. Saori's disney electone album has a beautiful orchestra arrangement of Part of your world.sounds great! Saori's disney pieces would never disappoint me! looking forward to get the scores =)
Few days ago my sister gave me the music score -"part of your world", a simple version of disney grade 7-6..


I was really excited at that moment! Oh well, it motivates me to fix my desktop in order for me to transfer all the music data into the diskette! *Seems like an External USB floppy disk drive is vital for me* Well I managed to fixed the mess which caused by my sister...


After 20 minutes of practising, Done! However there are some minor mistakes, due to the laser printer -__-" There's a wide big "white" empty line in the middle of the paper.. Therefore I couldn't read it properly in the middle part... -__-"
Well my cousin loves this song a lot, Well I decided record this performances and upload this video to youtube.

Part of your world


Enjoy!Hope you like it =) *Please pause or stop the music box located on above to prevent any interruptions*
More videos coming soon, tune up! =P

dash-dash!!

Well... wake up in the morning, it's going to be a busy day huh...

certainly I guess today would be a busy day for me! - dating with some occasional people, meeting up friends and of course doing my assignment ....

Ow .. yesterday you wasn't there sweetie! why you were absent? Maybe I get used to your present, your existences and your....

Forget about it, focus - focus =) I will be waiting for you, wishing you were someday lay down on my shoulder and slowly fall.... 

You're an amazing gift from god,

I'm grateful for knowing you in my life,

Thanks for everything,

Amen 

好吧。。

就在这一刻，
很无奈的有盼望着您的回复，
我真的好想知道你在想什么呢？
我可以在与你见面吗？
当你从假期回来时，你说你要重新开始一个新的生活。。
好啊！ 我可以等。。 我不介意，我不在乎别人如何看待我。。
你是我唯一。。。
真心的祝福你快乐！

鸿上

Orz!!!

Oh! I've been dizzy and lazy lately o(~.~)o

I don't feel like doing anything at this moment...

Mushroom-ing at home, so I decided to create a new post on blog lol..

Well... Yesterday was my birthday, nothing special... 

Maybe I'm used to celebrate birthday with myself ... haha

lol... Perhaps this year would be slightly different, celebrate with friends and ... ^^

Oh... Yesterday I've arranged my schedule, so it would be shopping, eating, shopping, and shopping endlessly hahaha!

Well... 1Utama, The Curve + Ikano Power centre, Pavilion...

I've made it so far lol!! Perhaps time management is important, I would agree with my Pro com lecturer! "Do you think this is veryx5 important? It comes along with British accent haha! She has a beautiful accent that every one of us in class would agree with it!

Made up my mind! Posting some beautiful pictures that had been captured when I was shopping and walking around in Curve's pet shop...

Guinea pig and rabbit are lovely and adorable! isn't it? I wish I could have one of em beside me!

Nice parrot and lazy little hamster!!!

So tired!! Latest update picture of myself!

I am getting fatter and fatter oh god!

It's time for me to diet! I don't want to be Nikki Blonsky OR Queen Latifah either... DAMN IT!

Guess I am going to sleep now, good night ^^

Happy birthday to a lonely and depressed boy that he wish someday he could....

@day 1

Phew.. let's count how many days has passed..
Hmm 3days has passed, time flew by so quickly!
Gosh... I wish time could stop at the origin point... 
Let's talk about the journey!


@Day 1
Tickets ready, everything packed.. ready for the journey!
It takes 3~4 hour for us to reached Taiping (Simpang) Kar Hou hometown ^^
Hmmm.. once we reached Simpang, we will give him a call for picking us up from shell station,
however he's having a nice sweet moment of haircut...
and.. we need to wait for him ~_~

The weather was so hot! argh.. lol
What we planned for our schedule : "Agenda"

- eat a lot of famous nice food from Taiping

-Visiting local famous places - Taiping zoo, lake garden

-Maxwell Hill (Bukit Larut - Plan to stay overnight)

-Ah gua a.k.a pondan park (Taman Eliathamby), gay park (in lake garden) due to our curiosity ^^

Well...

Talking about the first day, we just have fun by roaming around in taiping town, 

 ip man 2 is targeted by us, this is my second time for watching the movie lol... This movie is worth watching for several times -_-"

We are going to McDonal for our supper!

ARGH... McDonald Again? in TAIPING? @@
For me I would have visited 3 or 4 times a week when I was in KL...
LOL... perhaps foods from McD are irresistible to me...

@day 2 will be continued... ^^ soon...

Thankyou lord for your blessings on us,
in the name of Jesus,

Amen

Going on vacation for two-three days

Right now it was middle of the night, (nearly I could hear noises and saw the polluted fumes from buses are occupying the fresh air and killing silences without deliberation from us.

Argh... It is a starting point for a busy day!
It's time for me to sleep =D

We are going to Taiping for 2-3days.. not sure yet..

Maybe we are going to visit maxwell hill, lake garden..

(Ah gua park, Gay park or war cemetery) seems to be intense  LOL! 

We haven't plan what we want to do, nor any activities...

After the vacation, I will discuss and talk about the trip =D

(Just found this prayers from the internet, hope it helps)

"In the name of God I go on this journey.
May God the Father be with me,
God the Son protect me, and
God the Holy Ghost be by my side.
Whoever is stronger than these three persons
May approach my body and my life; yet
Whoso is not stronger than these three
Would much better let me be!

Let us have a safe journey,

In the name of Jesus

Amen"

We are the children of god,

Praise to the lord, the almighty!

Morning..

I don't know,

Today either is a good or a bad day ahead of me,

well certainly something needs to be done..

Just hoping that things are not changing irregularly,

I will pass everything onto your hand,

Thank you for helping me and guiding me while I'm lost...

in the name of Jesus, Amen.

Just found this picture from google, it's beautiful...

feelin' better

I am feeling better right now,

Suddenly I want to swim,

Maybe I'm the one who cried pathetically..

Feel like doing something to express my self, I wish i could... 

it will makes me feel better?

perhaps?

Looking at the forsaken sky that would fall nothing except...

The day before exam and stress

Well... Today is Saturday.

Out of sudden, I received a call from my best friend - Lynn. He has invited me to Tokio Hotel concert, which organized by TM net because he's having extra tickets >.<" So I guess maybe I am quite lucky because normally he's extremely stingy!! Luckily he didn't redeem the extra ticket *Phew*

This month is coming out with a lot of nice movie! I couldn't resist myself from being attracted by those nice MOVIES!

These movies included:

Ip Man 2, Iron Man 2, The Crazies, The Losers...! a lot more

However, my exam is coming on next week... oh god -_-"

Anyhow I managed to watched all the nice movies on above within a week... (^_^)v

Guess what... I'm broke because these weeks is too often for me outgoing with friends and darling...  lol...

Something bad was happened...

Because he's moving from Tarc Villa (Wangsa Maju) area to Taman Melati condos in this week... of course his housemate haven't settle everything yet, included bills, internet access...

Unfortunately, he is the one who hold the house keys and he borrowed it to his friend... ended up he got trapped inside the house and unable to come out -__-" ridiculous ding dong! What to do... he need to wait until his friend to come back home.

The concert is held at 1Utama, 7pm... Actually we need to get there by 1pm+ because we have booked the movie ticket and the movie is showing at 02:45pm...

Luckily he made it, but we were late for 10 mins... >.<"

Guess what... later when we exited from the cinema, we planned to watch another movie again! argh... exam!

Thinking about the concert.. We need to plan it carefully to avoid time clashing... Both of us are targeting The Losers... the advertisement looks interesting and so cool! We were excited at that moment! heh

There's a picture captured on my old rusty phone...

As you can see, there are so many people queuing up for movies... lol 

Behind of us, there are 6 more lanes packed with people >.<" *suffocate* 

Finally, we managed to settled the tickets =D

After and Before the show @_@"

having lunch at mark's Asam Laksa and a cup of Starbuck coffee..

And a picture with this spec lol.. (looks arrogant)

Here it goes, the concert ^^

Tokio Hotel, a famous band from German, this time we were so lucky because we are able to meet them in live!!! What a great opportunities, well thanks to TM for organizing this event..

Phew... we was so exhausted... we stand there for around 2 - 3 hours ++

Well later on ... we were planning to go kelana jaya and having our dinner there... because it's late, around 10:30pm almost all shops or restaurant in 1Utama are closing... seeking for food ~_~ for god's sakes..

Forget about it and let's just wait for the movie lol...

The movie is starting at 11:45pm...

When the movie is over, I looked at my watch, I got shocked! it was 1:30pm ..

Kind of late... but its ok...

Lynn need to collect some stuff from his new house - Melati, so all the way he was driving from 1U to KL... *not bad for a person who drove such distances for the first time) We were starved... anyhow we just went to Jalan Ipoh and having dim sums... it was great!

It's time to go back, when I reached home, it was 4:00 am.

lol this week is my study week, I am supposed to stay at home and study instead of outing with friends... haha

Miss you dear, wishing you the best for your exams...

It's time for me to sleep now, good night o(^_^)V  

First day blogging

Ever since I can remember I've been helping around my friends to settle "blogging" issues.. Just some basic internet knowledge...

I found it it's interesting to me, because I can post any memorable activities or my daily routine into the blog and share with my friends or people around the world.

Well I'm just started a new blog, I need to acquire some basic knowledge of html language, html coding before I start to proceed adding more advance features like music, RSS feed into my blog.

I would like to thank you for visiting my page, just feel free to drop by any comments.

Cheer! 

Regards,

Alvin